[ it's...nice to finally hear more about claude and the more he speaks the more she was right to assume they had a lot in common. fortunately, it's not like looking into a mirror. she couldn't bare to see someone else who looked like her here. unfortunately, though, is how his words fall on deaf ears. almost literally. she could get angry—she got angry—when someone else was so insistent on shoving hope in her face, but she's so tired. ]
You saw my hands. You've seen my face. [ she'll bring her hands up as a reminder of the wounds he saw. ] It was worse than that. Much worse.
[ there hadn't been any mirrors in that room to confirm but she knew what her insides felt like, her mind, her hands... the feeling of everything rotting away. the demon eating her from the inside out. again, she laughs humorlessly. ]
I've lost my blessing. [ the very thing that defined her and her family for generations. ] ...and even if I didn't, that demon isn't anything anyone can control. While I'm here, I'll do what there is to be done, but there's nothing waiting for me.
(He's quiet, letting her answer sit with him for a while. When he's had his time and he's ready once more, he moves, reaching to hold her hands in both of his firmly.
There's something important to her. Something she can't leave behind even if it means facing certain death. Their similarities are great but there are places where they differ.
(A boy in a foreign land, fighting for his life, willing to leave everything behind for a better future.))
I know when I can't win a fight. (He speaks quietly. She's convicted and perhaps today more than ever, it won't be easy to reason with her.) I won't press it anymore but I want you to know this:
(He leans forward, pressing his forehead to the top of hers,)
[ the silence is almost taken a sign of understanding as izumo thinks that he'd have given up on her (even though she knows it isn't the case). then, of course, he speaks and she's almost validated until she hears how he still believes in her. it makes her laugh and a few more tears fall from her face.
how many people will keep saying this to her, and how many more times will she have to reject them? the feeling of his hands on her's and his their head's touching feel surreal. ]
There's nothing to believe in.
[ however, hesitantly, she gives his hand a weak squeeze. ]
...but keep trusting me when I say that I want to know what's going on here. I want to know the truth and stop these murders.
[ unfortunately, no, this is not one of those things that izumo will get over with some nice words. or, well, not as things are currently. she looks over towards kano's bed and then to the ground in front of her.
she feels as though she has overstayed her welcome by a lot and there's an uneasiness in her chest now. somethings were said but then there was some that wasn't. hm. still... ]
I'll stay here for a while.
[ she'll take back one of her hands to use the back side of her arm to wipe her face. ]
...just until I start to feel sick from being separated for too long. [ at the same time— ] Will it be okay for you?
[ an empty room. one that used to be filled with someone who was far from silent. (as far as she knew.) ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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You saw my hands. You've seen my face. [ she'll bring her hands up as a reminder of the wounds he saw. ] It was worse than that. Much worse.
[ there hadn't been any mirrors in that room to confirm but she knew what her insides felt like, her mind, her hands... the feeling of everything rotting away. the demon eating her from the inside out. again, she laughs humorlessly. ]
I've lost my blessing. [ the very thing that defined her and her family for generations. ] ...and even if I didn't, that demon isn't anything anyone can control. While I'm here, I'll do what there is to be done, but there's nothing waiting for me.
[ this was the new conviction that she found. ]
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... If you go back home, do you truly believe it's the end?
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I do.
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(Would that help?)
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[ because even as selfish as she is, there is still someone more important than her life. ]
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(He's quiet, letting her answer sit with him for a while. When he's had his time and he's ready once more, he moves, reaching to hold her hands in both of his firmly.
There's something important to her. Something she can't leave behind even if it means facing certain death. Their similarities are great but there are places where they differ.
(A boy in a foreign land, fighting for his life, willing to leave everything behind for a better future.))
I know when I can't win a fight. (He speaks quietly. She's convicted and perhaps today more than ever, it won't be easy to reason with her.) I won't press it anymore but I want you to know this:
(He leans forward, pressing his forehead to the top of hers,)
I believe in you.
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how many people will keep saying this to her, and how many more times will she have to reject them? the feeling of his hands on her's and his their head's touching feel surreal. ]
There's nothing to believe in.
[ however, hesitantly, she gives his hand a weak squeeze. ]
...but keep trusting me when I say that I want to know what's going on here. I want to know the truth and stop these murders.
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Right.
(Sadly, and he leans back, giving her space once more. There's no winning this fight. Not today.)
You can stay if you want.
(Is there anything else she wants to say? Ah, but isn't it strange when Kano's bed is right there?)
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she feels as though she has overstayed her welcome by a lot and there's an uneasiness in her chest now. somethings were said but then there was some that wasn't. hm. still... ]
I'll stay here for a while.
[ she'll take back one of her hands to use the back side of her arm to wipe her face. ]
...just until I start to feel sick from being separated for too long. [ at the same time— ] Will it be okay for you?
[ an empty room. one that used to be filled with someone who was far from silent. (as far as she knew.) ]
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(He speaks softly, gently. He doesn't mind at all and he leans back on his hands, relaxing some.)
You can stay as long as you'd like.